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News :: International
barack obama WON the texas primary caucus
08 Mar 2008
It generally pays to wait until the end of the game to see who won.
barack obama WON the texas primary caucus. in other words hillary clinton LOST the texas primary caucus. in other words barack obama WON the big state of texas primary caucus. Barack Obama won Texas.

George W. Bush stood on the deck of the USS Abraham Lincoln and said, “Mission Accomplished”, to the cheers of the 4 thousand really hot navy guys on board – talk about your ultimate fantasies. In a fit of premature declaration Bill Clinton has been celebrating his big victory in Texas since last Tuesday. The only problem is that he lost.

Lets say that you called up your bookie and bet $4000 on the Dallas Stars hockey team to beat the Chicago Blackawks. You go to the game at the American Airlines Center in Dallas, Texas. Chicago beats Dallas 4 goals to 3. Then you call up your bookie and tell him that Dallas won the game and you want to pick up your money honey. Your bookie says, “What are you talking about, Chicago won the game 4 goals to 3. You owe me $4000. Pay up by tonight or you’re a dead man!”

Last week Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton contested the big state of Texas primary caucus. In a primary caucus the equivalent of goals in hockey is delegates. In the Texas primary caucus last week, Barack Obama won 98 delegates and Hillary Clinton won 95 delegates. If you went to Las Vegas and bet on Barack Obama to win the Texas primary caucus, I am pleased to inform you that you won. Barack Obama won the big state of Texas by 3 goals.

If your brain now hurts you are suffering from cognitive dissonance. Here, this might help. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas. Barack Obama Won Texas.

Who won Texas? The entire world has been mesmerized by the American election process since it began 14 months ago because the future of the Middle East and the World is hanging in the balance. If a person is elected for a 4 year term and spends 2 years campaigning, shouldn’t the primary question in the voters’ minds be, “Who is the best campaigner?” The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain. Why doesn’t it fall on the mountains? Or, does it?

If this will stop you from having a stroke, Hillary Clinton won Texas, because as in golf the person with the lower score wins – just telepath Lord Byron. John McCain said, “Surge Accomplished.” If the surge worked then why aren’t the boys and girls home yet? Why aren’t the boys and girls home from Iraq yet if the surge has worked. If the surge has worked why does John McCain tell us that the American troops will be in Iraq for another 100 years? Why are Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton telling us that if they are elected, they are going to bring the combat troops home from Iraq but not the non combat troops, unless something happens and they have to leave the combat troops there too. What is the definition of a combat troop? How is your head feeling? The size of the clubhead is inversely proportional to the launch angle.

In “The Little Prince” the fox said, “Words are a source of misunderstanding”, just so that I don’t get accused of plagiarism. Do you remember plagiarism gate? I don’t. What was that about? We seem to collectively have the attention span of a gnat. We strain at gnats yet we swallow camels whole. God came to earth to tell us that? Perhaps if I number every sentence my words will have more credibility. (Ex. 20:1-20). If you are a Catholic and you thought that you were a Christian, then according to John McCain’s spiritual advisor John Hagee, you are wrong. According to John McCain’s straight talk express spiritual advisor Pope Benedict XVI is actually a Hindu. Don’t tell the Pontiff until next yontiff unless you want to see his red yarmulkah go flying off of his head into a McCain like rage.

Doesn’t it bother you when all the people who know John McCain like Senators and Generals who have worked with him say that they are afraid to give him the red buttons because he flips into these fits of irrational blind rage and every time that you hear him talking he sounds like a cross between Captain Kangaroo and Mister Rogers?

The reason that words are a source of misunderstanding is because many words in the English language have 10 meanings and often our politicians and our media are not exactly candid with us. Hillary Clinton won Texas. Mission Accomplished. Surge Accomplished. We are bringing all of the combat troops home but we are leaving the non combat troops in Iraq. What are non combat troops? Does that mean that if the Sunnis we armed or the Shiites who are playing possum until we leave fire upon them, they will just stand there and die?

Our former enemy was Karl Marx. Do you think that when Karl Benz invented the car 125 years ago he knew that in 125 years his invention would trap the United States of America in Iraq for 100 years, or was that Edgar Cayce, or Michel de Nostradame? The American public has been sitting mesmerized by poll numbers for 14 months and they do not know that Barack Obama won Texas a week ago. O.K. Lets get serious for a moment.

Forget that. The situation on earth right now is so bad that you either have to laugh or cry. There will be plenty of time to cry during the Apocalypse. Right now John McCain, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are fighting over who gets George Bush’s Trojan Horse. The American people believe that who they elect will make a difference regarding climate change, nuclear world war 3, a 10 trillion dollar deficit, 2 million Americans jailed by other Americans, etc. How can you trust a country to vote for the right person when that country just elected George Bush twice? Perhaps whoever wins we should award the Presidency to the other person just based on the fact that we always get it wrong.
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