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ASSEMBLY INSTRUCTIONS: Putting Your New Iraqi Crypto-Colony Together (Puppet Regime Required)
by Lev Drofnas
26 Jul 2004
ASSEMBLY INSTRUCTIONS: Putting Your New Iraqi Crypto-Colony Together (requires Puppet Regime):
CONGRATULATIONS on the acquisition of your new colony in Iraq. (As always, we're not very concerned about how you came by it. Let's just say, you broke it, and thus you've got it--at least, until the heroic Iraqi people take it bake from you.).
1)Invade and Overthrow the current nationalist government, using every available pretext, with a bloody, high-tech illegal war of aggression.
2)Occupy the victim. Lay out all the pieces (Sunni, Shia, Kurd) in front of you. Divide et impera: keep the pieces separate, but try to keep them either from actually fighting each other (if this happens, you'll have to throw the entire mess away) or reuniting to fight you (in which case you will be forced to give them back their country).
3)Disrupt, confuse and demoralize Iraqi Civil Society. Persecute and Assasinate the natural indigenous leaders of the Iraqi people; terrorize the people with genocidal violence, including mass disappearances, rape and torture; cynically and deceitfully call your program "Freedom".
4)Allow crime and disorder to run so rampant that the victims will cry out for "law and order", and some will even welcome an apparent "strong man". (This may even require the importation of provocateurs to stir things up a bit - like you did for 9/11/2001).
5)Select a muderous pseudo- and anti-Iraqi Puppet, a la Pinochet or the Shah, to enforce the imperialists' interests by instituting a vicious police state. Seek to fool the victims again with apparently-strong and "patriotic" slogans like "cutting the heads off' the "anti-Iraqi" forces.
6)Identify and work with unprincipled local collaborators to milk the country's resources for the benefit and profit of the USraeli world empire. Lay waste the economy by sanctions, war and policy; see to it that as many Iraqis as possible suffer unemployment. (It is acceptable, though, to hire some of the locals as cops for the puppet regime; they can bleed and die for the Empire as you Iraqize the continuing War Against the Iraqi people).
7)Provide Workfare for tens of thousands of otherwise-unemployable American trash, both those in uniform deployed there and those working for the hordes of opportunistic private contractors who will invade the land like locusts.
8)Acquire long-term military basing rights from your Puppet regime. This both further secures the regional security of Israhell and provides a jumping-off point for the next campaign in the endless aggressive War Against Mankind.
We sincerely hope that your new colony turns out to be ALL that you so richly deserve.
This work is in the public domain