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News ::
Bush Revealed - Humbug in the Whitehouse (english)
05 Dec 2002
As the holiday season approaches and Americans prepare for warm family homecomings and joyful celebrations, Mr. Bush and his advisors huddle in the Whitehouse basement preparing for an unwarranted war in Iraq.

Washington, DC – Try as he may to portray himself as a regular guy, nine out of ten experts agreed today that the present occupant in the Whitehouse is, for all intents and purposes, a total sociopath. “To be quite frank”, announced Professor I.M. Frank of the Institute for the Study of Maladjustment, “the man in the Whitehouse is what one might refer to as a complete humbug!”
As the holiday season approaches and Americans prepare for warm family homecomings and joyful celebrations, Mr. Bush and his advisors huddle in the Whitehouse basement preparing for an unwarranted war in Iraq. These sorts of mixed messages are what experts point toward as indicators of the Administration’s “issues with goodwill”. Rather than don a Santa suit of red and white, Bush and his councilors have chosen to wear a fig leaf of international weapons inspections. Most observers believe they will shed that leaf in the near future and pursue their ongoing plans for naked aggression in the pursuit of empire and oil.
“Our feeling is that Mr. Bush may have once had the holiday spirit”, noted Mary Day, spokesperson for the Few Charitable Trusts, one of the groups sponsoring the announcement of today’s survey. “Studies indicate that young George W. did a good deal of joyous celebrating during his college days.” Ms. Day went on to explain that at some point the harsh realities of the business world may have soured the future occupant of the Whitehouse. “Bush probably felt burned by the numerous ugly aspects of capitalism”, said Day, “Given the heartlessness, greed, and avarice we associate with capitalism, it’s not hard to imagine the effects on a man of Mr. Bush’s intelligence.” Day explained that their study revealed that Bush “was an easy target for the insular forces of selfishness perpetrated by industry and commerce in the U.S.” “Those are the special interests that turn our children into the sort of humbugs we find in the Administration today.” She stated.
Further evidence of Mr. Bush’s problems with goodwill surfaced during a recent interview held between members of the Few Trusts and the man in the Whitehouse. When asked about the problem of rising homelessness and poverty in the world’s richest nation, Mr. Bush reportedly responded: “Are there no prisons, are there no workhouses?”
Advisors and handlers of Mr. Bush, as well as many family members, also appear to suffer from similar shortcomings. Pointing toward Richard Cheney, Mr. Frank noted: “the man’s heart seems sadly lacking.” “ Mr. Bush’s alleged second-in-command is not what one might consider a charitable fellow”, explained Frank, “In fact, Cheney appears to be a miserable specimen of a human being who gives every indication of having succumbed to bitter sarcasms, smugness, and a self-righteous meanness that surpasses most others.” While such negative traits may be attributable to the influence of Lynn Cheney, the wife of the so-called second-in-command, it was pointed out by others at today’s briefing that similar traits can be found abundant among most other members of the present Administration as well as the Supreme Court and Congress.
“Perhaps it’s a sign of the times”, noted Ms. Day, “But surely we can do better than this!”
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