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Parent Article: The Shortwave Report 08/22/14 Listen Globally!
Re: The Shortwave Report 08/22/14 Listen Globally!
23 Aug 2014
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◾I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross a road without its motives being questioned.
◾Typo’s aren’t my biggest problem – Thinko’s are.
◾Razors pain you, Rivers are damp, Acids stain you, And drugs cause cramp, Guns aren’t lawful, Nooses give, Gas smells awful, You might as well live.
◾As I was going up the stair, I met a man who wasn’t there. He wasn’t there again today. I wish, I wish he’d stay away.
◾See the happy moron, He doesn’t give a damn. I wish I were a moron, My God! Perhaps I am!
◾I have something to say, it’s better to die young, than to fade away. — Highlander
◾Term, holidays, term, holidays, till we leave school, and then work, work, work till we die. — C.S. Lewis
◾I used to have a drinking problem. Now I love the stuff.
◾Let your day be neither manic nor volcanic.
◾Remember to keep your feet on the ground or you will fall over — William Dawson
◾My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn’t.
◾I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me!
◾Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.
◾I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
◾Don’t take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
◾You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
◾Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
◾Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
◾I’m not a complete idiot — Some parts are missing.
◾Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
◾God must love stupid people; He made so many.
◾The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
◾Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
◾Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
◾I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
◾A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
◾Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
◾They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
◾He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
◾A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
◾Ham and eggs. A day’s work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
◾The trouble with life is there’s no background music.
◾The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.
◾I smile because I don’t know what the hell is going on.
◾Attitude is infectious… Is yours worth catching?
◾Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
◾Linux is like a wigwam. No Windows, no Gates and Apache inside!
◾I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.