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Commentary ::
True Confession of an FBI Agent
13 Jul 2004
Life sucks after 9/11.

True Confession of an FBI Agent

OK, so I liked my job more before 9/11 than I do now.  Things were really swell until those jets crashed into the Twin Towers and the Pentagon.  I really felt good about what I was doing.  I would spend the entire day online looking at child pornography, "pretending" to be a pedophile and entrapping other pedophiles.  I would visit the blogs of teenagers and harass them.  My favorite technique was to post links to FBI run pedophile websites and then collect the IP addresses from the logs.  9/11 really messed up my dream job.

Right after 9/11 more than half of us in the FBI child porn office were redirected to silencing American supporters of bin-Laden.  As our Bush said, "you were either with him or against him."  If you were against Bush and posting criticism of Bush online, we targeted you.  It started with online forums.  We would make contact with the forum administrators and they would give us IP information on anti-Bush posters.  After passage of the PATRIOT Act, we'd obtain warrants to put CARNIVORE on the ISP's of targets.  Don't believe what we told you about CARNIVORE.  We have a lot of control over how it manipulates the package stream.  We can substitute packets with our own packets.  That means we can alter your uploads and downloads, in real time.  We do it by programming the packet sniffer/interceptor/substitutor.  Using pattern matching, we trap specific patterns of packets containing text we don't like or wish to modify and then substitute those packets with the packets we choose.  We can and do plant incriminating evidence.  If you're uploading your website, we can substitute content that you previously uploaded with modified content using the substitutor.  Unless you compare and contrast what you believe is on your website with what be substituted during an upload, you won't even know that we framed you.

I miss the child pornography.  The closest I get to it any more is accusing my targets of being pedophiles, planting material on their machines, uploading Trojan horses on their machines to make their machines secret porn servers and posting pedophilic remarks in their names.  It's not as fun as the real thing, but it gives me a thrill.

I don't regret the damage I'm doing to their lives.  They are the enemy.  I just miss the excitement of my old task.


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Re: True Confession of an FBI Agent
13 Jul 2004
Oh oh.... Someone got caught...
Re: True Confession of an FBI Agent
13 Jul 2004
Cops spend so much time on porn internet because its easy and they like it
Re: True Confession of an FBI Agent
13 Jul 2004
I wonder if I told Dick Cheney to ****off, if the FBI would bust me? (Just doing the same thing he did to a U.S. Senator!)
These neo-cons are the biggest bigots since Hitler!
Porno is for rosey palm!
Get a girlfriend or boyfriend. It's much, much better!